Thursday, September 20, 2007

DID I MARRY THE RIGHT PERSON?

Someone sent me this. What do you reckon?


Just something to meditate on for those of us that are married, those thinking about it and those newly weds. During one seminar, a woman asked a common question. She said, "How do I know if I married the right person?" I noticed that there was a large man sitting next to her so I said, "It depends. Is that your husband?" In all seriousness, she answered "How do you know?" Let me answer this question because the chances are good that it's weighing on your mind. Here's the answer. EVERY relationship has a cycle. In the beginning, you fall in love with your spouse. You anticipate their calls, want their touch, and like their idiosyncrasies.




Falling in love with your spouse/partner wasn't hard. In fact, it was a completely natural and spontaneous experience. You didn't have to DO anything. That's why it's called "falling" in love... because it's happening TO YOU. People in love sometimes say, "I was swept of my feet." Think about the imagery of that expression. It implies that you were just standing there; doing nothing, and then something exciting just engulfed you. Falling in love is easy. It's a passive and spontaneous experience.




But after a few years of marriage/courtship, the euphoria of love fades. It's the natural cycle of EVERY relationship. Slowly but surely, phone calls become a bother (if they come at all), touch is not always welcome (when it happens), and your spouse's idiosyncrasies, instead of being cute, drive you nuts. The symptoms of this stage vary with every relationship, but if you think about your marriage, you will notice a dramatic difference between the initial stage when you were in love and a much duller or even angry subsequent stage. At this point, you and/or your spouse/partner might start asking, "Did I marry the right person? Or am I dating the right person?" And as you and your spouse reflect on the euphoria of the love you once had, you may begin to desire that experience with someone else.




This is when marriages/relations hips breakdown. People blame their spouse for their unhappiness and look outside their marriage/relationship for fulfillment. Extramarital fulfillment comes in all shapes and sizes. Infidelity is the most obvious (mostly men). But sometimes people turn to work, a hobby, a friendship, excessive TV, or abusive substances. But the answer to this dilemma does NOT lie outside your marriage/relationship, it lies within it. I'm not saying that you couldn't fall in love with someone else, you could, & TEMPORARILY you'd feel better. But you'd be in the same situation a few years later. Because (listen carefully to this): THE KEY TO SUCCEEDING IN MARRIAGE/RELATIONSH IP IS NOT FINDING THE RIGHT PERSON; IT'S LEARNING TO LOVE THE PERSON YOU FOUND. SUSTAINING love is not a passive or spontaneous experience. It'll NEVER just happen to you. You can't "find" LASTING love. You have to "make" it day in and day out. That's why we have the expression "the labour of love"; because it takes time, effort, and energy. And most importantly, it takes WISDOM. You have to know WHAT TO DO to make your marriage/relationship work. Make no mistake about it. Love is NOT a mystery.






There are specific things you can do (with or without your spouse) to succeed with your marriage/relationship. Just as there are physical laws of the universe (such as gravity), there are also laws for relationships. Just as the right diet and exercise program makes you physically stronger, certain habits in your relationship WILL make your marriage stronger. It's a direct cause and effect. If you know and apply the laws, the results are predictable. ..you can "make" love.




Love in marriage/relationship is indeed a "decision".. .. Not just a feeling.

Wednesday, September 19, 2007

Am next in line for a miracle

Yesterday was more than i imagined. Haven't gotten the job yet and no it's not the Lekki one.



I was on my way to some meeting and i got the call at 5 Mins past 1 asking that i come to a certain Bank at 2pm. I thought to myself 2pm in Lagos with all the traffic. I tried to negotiate my way to getting there for 3pm or maybe the next day. I wondered what it was and i wasn't properly dressed, but i made up my mind to go anyway.





It was the nicest interview i had had in years and it was for the legal department, something i had been hoping and scrambling for. Does it mean that in Nigeria if you don't know someone nothing for you? I mean there was no formal vacancy announcement. I am grateful all the same, but it's not fair. Results are not out yet but me being me and being anxious for nothing. I believe I'll get the job, the lady seemed interested and i expect to hear from them soon. For now I've been planning my exit, thanking God i wouldn't end up in Lekki for the same salary and working conditions. Thanking God i listened to a certain cousin of mine (she asked me to learn to pray for myself and listen/ wait for God's direction).




I have so much hope and soon i Will be celebrating this job and as a human being waiting for my actual bump. It's difficult to get your mind away from that. Great things are happening and for me they come in hundreds of folds.




Lord am expectant, Lord am thankful.




I'll keep u guys posted and yes this means in due time i will turn down the Lekki offer. My time to be settled has come......

Tuesday, September 18, 2007

BUMP

Basically nothings been happening so i have nothing to blog about.
I hope the birthday dinner we are going for tonight would be eventful, maybe I'll have something to say.
I got interviewed for a new job and got the offer, its in Lekki, dunno how i will do the mad traffic so am undecided. Because it's not much different from what i do now, one man show etc etc....
OK that's all folks.

Monday, September 10, 2007

Atkins Diet

I did this diet 3 years ago. I guess i only followed the induction and didn't follow up. Once again the heat is on, i have dusted myself up and am ready to give it another go. I have also dusted my Billy Blank's Boot Camp DVD (woke up at 4.30 and worked it) There are so many theories of how the Atkin's is a bad diet etc, but........ am going to see my doctor (thanks to my darling Keke) on Wedenesday.
Phases
There are four phases of the Atkins diet: induction, ongoing weight loss, pre-maintenance and lifetime maintenance
Induction
The Induction phase is the first, and most restrictive, phase of the Atkins Nutritional Approach. It is intended to cause the body to quickly enter a state of ketosis. Carbohydrate intake is limited to 20 net grams per day (grams of carbohydrates minus grams of fiber, sugar alcohols, or glycerin), 12 to 15 net grams of which must come in the form of salad greens and other vegetables. The allowed foods include a liberal amount of all meats, fish, shellfish, fowl, and eggs; up to 4 ounces (113 g) of soft or semi-soft cheese; salad vegetables; other low carb vegetables; and butter and vegetable oils. Alcoholic beverages are not allowed during this phase [1]. Caffeine is allowed in moderation so long as it does not cause cravings or low blood sugar. If a caffeine addiction is evident, it is best to not allow it until later phases of the diet.[2] A daily multivitamin with minerals is also recommended.
The Induction Phase is usually when many see the most significant weight loss — reports of losses of 5 to 10 pounds per week are not uncommon when Induction is combined with daily exercise.
Atkins suggests the use of Ketostix, small chemically reactive strips used by diabetics. These let the dieter monitor when they enter the ketosis, or fat burning, phase.
Weight loss will vary by person, especially based on the amount needed to lose, but most people average approximately 10% of their total weight loss within the Induction period. Other indicators of ketosis include a metallic taste in the mouth, or bad breath.

Ongoing weight loss
The Ongoing Weight Loss (OWL) phase of Atkins consists of an increase in carbohydrate intake, but remaining at levels where weight loss occurs. The target daily carbohydrate intake increases each week by 2 net grams. A goal in OWL is to find the "Critical Carbohydrate Level for Losing" and to learn in a controlled manner how food groups in increasing glycemic levels and foods within that group affect your craving control. The OWL phase lasts until weight is within 10 pounds (4.5 kg) of the target weight. At first weeks you should add more of the induction acceptable vegetables to your daily products. For example, 6-8 stalks of asparagus, salad, one cup of cauliflower or one half of avocado. The next week you should follow the carbohydrate ladder Dr Atkins created for this phase and add fresh dairy. The ladder has 9 rungs and should be added in order given. One can skip a rung if one does not intend to include that food group in one's permanent way of eating such as the alcohol rung.
The rungs are as follows:
Induction acceptable vegetables
Fresh dairy
Nuts
Berries
Alcohol
Legumes
Other fruits
Starchy vegetables
Grains

Pre-maintenance
Carbohydrate intake is increased again this time by 10 net carbs a week from the ladder groupings, and the key goal in this phase is to find the "Critical Carbohydrate Level for Maintenance", this is the maximum number of carbohydrates you can eat each day without gaining weight. This may well be above the level of carbohydrates inducing ketosis on a testing stick. As a result, it is not necessary to maintain a positive ketosis test long term.

Lifetime maintenance
This phase is intended to carry on the habits acquired in the previous phases, and avoid the common end-of-diet mindset that can return people to their previous habits and previous weight. Whole, unprocessed food choices are emphasized, with the option to drop back to an earlier phase if you begin to gain weight.

Monday, September 3, 2007

And so

My weekend was nice. My time at home even better.



I went to see my mother-in-law, who sat me down for hours teaching me some little facts about being a woman. I saw a very strong woman in her and i admire her perseverance. She has a very small frame and is very quite but you will know she is a wise woman. People came in numbers to see her, you could read the kind of respect they have for her from their body language. It was a time of reflection for the woman. She showed me loads of pictures of the good old days. In all i had a peaceful time. Above all she told me i was beautiful (because i refused to eat much, claiming i wanted to loose weight). For the two nights we prayed and prayed. Now i see why her son always refers to her as a virtuous woman. I must confess she truly is.





BTW does anyone know the leaf called Uziza, it's bitter? because she has recommended i try to eat it at least twice a week "so i don't fall sick" am sure there's more to it. My younger sister has said her friend's eat it for" you know what" am just curious.



Am back at work now, our new office manager has started work yay!



I miss DH, yesteday night i twisted my arm and dislocated it, had to scream for my sister to come and HELP. He would have done it better or maybe if he was around it wouldn't have happened cos i wouldn't have been rolling from one side of the bed to the other..........................



I also feel some kind of peace within me, like something has happened or is about to happen.



A great way to start my month, i wish myself and you guys the best month ever.